well..

...nothing particular today. sofie is recuperating from methotrexate introduced intravenously, now likewise being flushed from of her system. the methotrexate takes about 4 hours to administer. flushing takes 3-4 days.

here's what's basically involved in chemo:

essentially the body is subjected to controlled poisoning to kill off those nasty microbes that resulted in cancer in the first place. the poison (chemo) must then be flushed from the system, otherwise the patient would die from, well, poisoning. in the process, vital microbes are simultaneously killed. the chemo brings the patient closely as possible to a "safe" brink of death just in time to be flushed of the poison. the patient then waits for the body to regenerate just enough vital microbes for the process to begin again. this is repeated over and over and over and over, all based on statistical protocols developed over the last 40 or so years. "statistical" means that these treatments are best guesses based on observation of indirect results, not direct observation of the chemo actually doing what is supposed. remarkable how much faith we exercise in statistical data, but thank god for all those doing the research over the years and currently! sofie's own data is being submitted to a national data base for ongoing research and analysis.

for those who don't know, over the course of the last 100 years or so the chemicals (chemo) now used for these treatments were discovered quite by accident from bellicose (look it up) applications.

--geoff

courage

another in the ever growing history of courageous moments: sofie finally let damon see her lovely bald head. so charming they both are.

nausea

listening to ben folds solo acapella remake of his own "brick." wow, beautiful. damon and sofie share fabulous tastes in music.

just a quick update: sofie responded more negatively to the methotrexate (an historical derivative of...mustard gas!) this go round, in fact nearly as much as to the more virulent cisplatin. her body hurt all over and she ultimately threw up from the nausea experienced throughout the day. however, good news: her very kind and enjoyable nurse, mitch, was able to get on top of it. to give you some idea of some of the medications involved, i quote sofie: "i love morphine." (yes, we've had the conversation regarding opiates and potential addiction.)

--geoff

sobering conversation

well, here at the hospital for one of sofie's final chemo rounds pre-surgery. this round is methotrexate, the effects of which have proved slightly less nauseating heretofore than others. we hope the same holds true this weekend.

damon, sofie's dear friend, is here along with me, dad. bonnie is with her incredibly kind sister, jessica, for a session at the temple. grandpa turner came by for a while and brought his famous clam dip (if you knew how yummy it is, you'd wish you were here too!) he will return later with grandma turner. we are incapable of expressing the depth of our gratitude for their support through these challenging times. nevertheless, thank you so, so much, grandpa and grandma turner.

we just had a sit-down with dr jones who will remove the tumor and execute the treatment decided upon. we went over treatment options and time line for her surgery:

first of all, tentatively, and probably, the surgery should happen on or near dec 28. sofie sort of made an impromptu decision during the discussion to forgo a trip she had been considering to new york with her english class that was scheduled around that same time. she feels she probably wouldn't have energy for all the activities anyway and just wants to get on with surgery which would have been postponed otherwise to accommodate the trip.

the discussion with dr jones was a harder one than i had anticipated, the hardest for me since first receiving confirmation of the diagnosis. sofie, who has had her share of difficult news lately, over and beyond what she's dealing with medically, said simply, "i'm used to hard news by now."

turns out a procedure which i had taken for granted as de facto may not be so de facto after all. the procedure in question is that of metallic replacement for a large portion of the upper tibia and knee. there is much to say which i may not at this point, but suffice that dr jones indicated amputation is not necessarily a wrong option in some cases. moreover, the procedure i assumed, as complications occasionally arise, can lead to amputation. i have a strong sense we will almost certainly proceed with saving the limb (metallic inserts replacing bone), but the conversation was most sobering.

that said, sofie is generally ok even emotionally despite the conversation, and so am i. i worry for some who have so much on their plate, but i trust heavenly father will provide. i anticipate we will continue to deal with our emotions as we encounter them and that heavenly father will continue to provide strength one to another, between each of us, and together so that we come to places of peace moment to moment, day by day.

so god bless all of us during this holiday season. i love all of you, and i love sofie. lastly, thanks to her mother who is experiencing hardship beyond belief. god bless such a mother who deserves nothing but love and support at this time.

--geoff

Biggest Surprise! November 21st

Today we presented Sofie and Clara with a long awaited surprise. They had NO CLUE. We told them to get ready for a night on the town. Then at 5 pm we sat them down and gave them 2 gift wrapped boxes with front row tix to Season 5 SUTUCD tour... last show of the season! These tix came with back stage passes to meet the dancers!!! What a show it was... WOW! Three hours long and then an hour meetand greet with the dancers. They knew Sofie's story because a friend of mine had gone backstage in SLC with a big "Get Well Sofie" banner that all the dancers had signed when sof was in for chemo. So Sofie took all the dancers her black and white pointe photo signed with a thank-you to each dancer. They were all so warm and receiving of her. Felt like we were with family. Sof practically filmed the whole show on her phone last night and we will post our photos!! Sooooo fun! How could Season 6 be any better than "FIVE ALIVE"!!!! Bonnie

PS. Thank-you Tami Larsen for the back stage passes through your contact.. RANDI EVANS!!!!
PPS Thank-you Megan Maxwell for arranging this surprise and your gift to Sofie... her ticket!

November 20th- Clara and Sofie reunited!

Enjoyed our first full day with family and friends in Duvall! Got scolded by my dear high school friend for not blogging daily! So... just wanted you all to know that if I dont blog a day or two it means that Sofie is well and not sick! Yesterday was definitely tiring for Sof but she slept in this morning and had a good day. She visited the dance studios of her cousin Clara and watched a video of Clara playing "Peter Pan" at 2009 Spring performance. They both share a love of dance!

In just a few more days, Dancer's Workshop is putting out the dance calendar with Sofie on the cover, playing "the Stork" on pointe. Very excited for that. It's a fundraiser that DW is putting on for Sofies wellness fund. If anyone wants a copy just leave a comment on this post and I will earmark and ship a copy for you. The photography is black and white by Zack Rosser and it's beautiful!! Bonnie

November 19th-Sleepless in Seattle!

The excitement is more than we can handle! Upon arriving at Aunt Jennies home in Duvall, Wa, Sof snuck into her cousins room and hid under the covers. Clara (fav cousin ever) had no clue we were coming. Her mom told her to go clean her room at which time she FINALLY discovered Sofie and began to sob joyous tears! It was the reunion of all time. Gillian (10 yrs old), another cousin also stood there weeping at the surprise. Half an hour later, Olivia(13 yrs), came home. Sof hid again in her bed and another BIG surprise ensued. Needless to say we are in "cousin heaven" out here and plan to stay for a long week-end. Bennie(7 yrs old) is performing his Michael Jackson moves like crazy and we are all amazed!
Sof's blood work is very compromised and lower than ever but we dont make any moves without talking to her treatment team first. It's all about the mask, sanitized hands, and staying away from sick people. Her platlettes are very low which means her blood cant clot well on its own to stop bleeding. If she has "a bleed" of any kind which is uncontrollable, she has to get a blood transfusion. On the flight to Seattle, her nose began to bleed. 45 minutes later it finally stopped. Oncology likes to get a phone call after 10 minutes. Mid flight, we couldnt do that, but called as soon as we could. Luckily the bleeding had stopped at that point. We definitely prayed before we left that all would be well as she enjoys this joyous occassion with family. We continue to learn a lot about this disease and feel empowered in that. Bonnie