October 19th saying good-bye

Crossed another bridge last night at 12:30 am when Sofie woke me up and quietly told me it me that it was time to take her hair off. She had been wearing it in a pony tail for a week, eeking out all of the time she could with her long blonde locks. Scared to wash it, she finally did, knowing what the outcome would be. I held her hands tightly while Jeff shaved it. She was never more beautiful to me in that moment of struggle and tears. What is it about a woman's hair, her crown...? She chose not to look, I found a soft cap for her to sleep in, dad gave her a blessing and we fell asleep in her bed. I woke her this next morning at about 9:30. Her home nurse was here to take blood and vitals. Her words to me when she knew it was time to awaken were, "but I dont know how to be bald". Due to many many txts on her phone of love and encouragement and the anticipation of an early morning visit from many friends, she went downstairs alone and took off her cap in front of the mirror. I wasn't there for that moment but I knew it was happening. As she described later to her friends and I, "I couldnt stop laughing!" Thank goodness all is well. We spent the day shopping for hats and trying on all the wigs at halloween head quarters. From anguish and tears to quiet and back to laughter. She never ceases to resurrect joy.... Mom